HI ALL!

It's been months. But, I'll be back soon! Just a week's time!

And my stay at Mumbai comes to an end in a short while. I am surprised that I am keen to go back and resume with academics in Nasik. Quite unnatural really. In a way, I feel I am missing my course and friends. Having said that, I know you don't make real thick friends in a span of a mere two months.

Mumbai was so particularly pathetic and nice, just as it ever is. Traffic jams, randomness in honking, humidity, packed local trains, smelly armpits and chameli ka tel ladened heads, pan stains all over, insane amount of spitting and that too on your head or foot if your back luck is terrific real bad on one such occasion ( this has happened to me once). Mumbai has a fair share of illnesses, caused by its very own people.

Mumbaikars are blessed with a lot of things a mumbaikar can't really forget or possibly stay without.
They could be as follows:
Cutting chai, Band stand, kanda bhajiya or a vada pav and samosas, corn bhutta, bhurum maska & bun maska in the railway canteen or an Iranian restaurant, a football game in the rains, cricket on a concrete pitch with a wet rubber ball, radio stations for housewives, idliwallah on Sundays, a nice little doze on the hall sofa with your head on a cozy pillow and a comfy kambal (Solapuri chaddar) to cover you while it rains outside, double omlette with ketchup and some bread, maggi and that too a double pack, a romantic book and preferably of Nicholas Sparks, a repeat telecast of yesterday's Wimbledon game, a miscellany of cultures, communities and thereby ideas, Kanga league on Shivaji Park, Azad and Cross Maidan, a front seat with a front window on the upper deck of a double decker. And there are many more I can't actually recall or may be haven't experienced.

You can enjoy all these things else where too. But for a mumbaikar staying outside Mumbai for varied reasons, he can't really feel, any where else than Mumbai,  the Mumbai spunk that is a constituent in all the above mentions.

I may have been a bit indulgent on what I feel about Mumbai. But then that is exactly what Mumbai does to me.

GOOD BYE Mumbai for a short while. I will be back there on the 1st of September. Ganesh Chaturthi.
Ganesh Chaturthi, the brass band entry of Ganesh Idols and the dancing, the gulaal, the ukadiche modak, the patrolling by the police, the visarjan at the chaupati. Ganeshotsav in Mumbai is complete awesomeness.

LATER.

MUMBAI BLUES

I got back to my home after about a month. Sister and my brother-in-law had arrived earlier. They were surprised to see me at the door with my heavy baggage and all. A small light joke on them, coming from my mother.

The dinner was, as usual, spot on. The delicacies cooked by my Mother T were Waran-bhat-aamti-bhaaji-poli-koshimbir. And to add some spunk to the already smashing treat was the serving of a huge bowl of   refrigerated aamras made from the home made palp of the Devgad hapus mangoes. To hell with the possibility of loss in nutrients and all, due to storage of foodstuff for long. Anything that is served on my plate by my mother and then that which goes in my Brobdingnagian and equally insatiable stomach cannot be ill-nutrient.

So all was well by then. My mother T had just finished asking me, the 928933th time, if my roomies smoked or fuddled. My father discussed with me about the Djokovic-Nadal final. He is a Federer fan. So, like most of the Federer fans, he had turned into a Djokovic fan, by default, that Sunday. My brother-in-law and I had a brief but pertinent discussion on the sex ratio of my MBA class. We also discussed films. I told them that Bal Gandharva was the only meaningful and worthy film I had been to, since in Nasik.

And my sister, construing that  the topic diverted to films, out of sheer and characteristic enthusiasm, told me about the death of notable actor Rasika Joshi. It shocks you, such news, at least for a second, especially when  the dead person seems real fit and fine the last time you saw the person on a chat show or in a movie. A few are destined to die young. Few achieve a lot in their small time period on earth, as if they almost tacitly know they have a short period. Example in such case is not restricted to Rasika Joshi. Dewang Mehta, Malcolm Marshall, Divya Bharati, all belong to that category.

Whoever out of those Junoon guys wrote these below two lines was spot on..

Kya bashar ki bisat  

Aaj hai kal nahin.

(Mortal's presence is so fickle

 Here one moment and gone the next.)

While I mention this, I know a part of me is sad for the death of some respected person. 

While I wonder if i should ever blog about it even. And in turn, spread the sadness. I intent not to, though. 

Chod meri khata 

Tu to pagal nahin

(Leave my follies 

 as you are not mad like me.)  

And I don't even want to talk about those fucksome blasts. 

LATER.

I AM VERY MUCH ALIVE ON THIS BLOG

It is that time on the earth when everything is meant to be a real crooked affair. It is the time on the earth when you can’t really act straight to a particular situation and if you happen to act straight, I bet you’ll lose upon a lot of opportunities. It is a time when every goddam thing is meant to be real unfair.

Haven’t blogged in a while, but promise a better job at it in future. The last time I blogged, blogspot.com had this REDIFF-STYLED-HTML-THINGY getup. This new scenario looks slick.

Well... LATER.. 

DISCRETE NEWS

I begin with a new week after having muttered a lot of flak for Ashish Nehra & for our Nature( for the former for proving that he is that version of Chetan Sharma which can actually pitch a cricket ball, even if that delivery happens to be a juicy & blue half volley capable of being bumped off out of the park even by the likes of Tim Henman & Ashish Nehra himself ; and for the latter for being very cruel to the Japanese people), I understand that we have a match  up with Australia & there will be lot of aftershocks of the magnitude enough to shake up an elephant or a belly filled python. We need to keep a portion of all that flak for further use on Ashish Nehra. Because if common sense prevails amongst you & me & in general we all, we must understand that ‘a lazy, totally unfit, unusually tall & exceptionally thin with teeth (protruding ones) that resemble to those of Badnaam Munni’ won’t learn to bowl banana-swinging Yorkers in the matter of 5-6 days. It is said that the Aussies are at their worst condition since the retirement of Mark Waugh i.e. since 2002. Though this Australian side does not intimidate the world with the names like Gilchrist, Warne, Mcgrath, Hayden & Martyn, they surely have a lot of match winners like Cameron White, Watson, Lee & Hussey. The Aussies can not be taken lightly. They are not their usual Invisibles, but they still continue to be good. And our bowling still continues to be an embarrassment of that magnitude as it has been all these years, if not more.

This week’s most important news is undoubtedly that coming from our South India. Chiranjeevi, the star who’s known for his on screen persona of being someone who fights against corruption, injustice, dowry, crime & rape, has been caught on the wrong side of the dangerously flowing deathly river. To cut the entire story & my tedious way of presenting it short, Chiranjeevi’s son has been accused for dowry harassment. My advice to his son, better give in writing a public apology, in case the bigger star, Rajni knows about this & there’s an earthquake in India followed by a tsunami.

Also, the super talented Uday Chopra wins (finally) an award at the Golden Kela Awards. Well, there can’t be bigger news than this. Mind you, it is not the only reason Uday Chopra keeps trending on Twitter. We all love him, don’t we?

And to abruptly put an end to this absolute non sense I have put in this post, let me add to it about the fact that I have resigned from my professional duties to practically do nothing in future, apart from watching hot movies, downloading more hot movies & then watching some more hot movies. And yes! Now that I have nothing to do, I can read daily Shobhaa De’s blog to have my share of enough laughter that will in turn keep me super fit, just like our dearest Shobhaa.

LATER.

I RESIGN!!!!!

Dear Boss,

                I take this awesome opportunity to tell you that I resign from YOUR & my duties. I had this great tempting to address this one to quite a few co-workers; and then display this on the notice board at the plant entrance. But, considering one of our values of our company viz. EMPATHY, I have decided not to carry out this public face-smash and instead send this letter to you, only. But, I also take this opportunity to warn you that I may keep a few bigger thugs in the CC & BCC options, an important lesson you have taught me.

When I shall think of you in future, though the likelihood of me remembering you seems highly unlikely, one sentence will always come to my mind, 

“IT TAKES THOUSANDS OF NUTS TO MAKE A CAR, BUT JUST ONE TO SMASH IT ALL OVER THE PARK!”

                Let me make you realize how lovely I feel as I write this letter to you. See this picture below; imagine that I am the kid & you are the wall.

What I considered to be a normal dust gunk under the mouse of our shared PC at the office was found to be, after keen study, your residual & now fully grounded boogers. This has been a sort of an epiphany, to prompt me to resign, apart from several other things on which I can dedicate a book upon.

I wanted to write much more. But, I came across this.

And I decided to put my sword down.

   

Regards,

Ameya AB.

PS: I have my exit interview lined up in today’s schedule. I am gonna suggest them a major cost cutting option. And I guess you have a fairly good idea what is it.  

LATER.

DISCRETE WC BULLETIN

News from Karachi is that the use of the above consumer product has been banned in Pakistan with immediate effect as on 08 03 2011. 

Yet, there is a 'feel good' environment in Pakistan especially after what the Pakistanis were made to see by Shoaib Akhtar yesterday. He has been quick to adjust himself in the role of a support off spinner for Pakistan. This extra spinner will give them an edge specially against matches that are not played against Canada as the other countries have batsmen with an acumen to know that Afridi doesn't turn the cricket ball much. 

A lot is expected from Akhtar-the offie as the Pakistanis are damn sure he can be anyways better than Shoaib  Malik, who can only do a bit of top spin and that too with a Yonex racket in his hand.

While in India, there is still an element of doubt in the minds of all Indians about the HELICOPTER shot, the DOOSRA and the PALTI HIT. The Helicopter shot has apparently lost fuel, the doosra has been long lost and the PALTI HIT is back to the Great Britain. 

One can hardly remember Piyush Chawla claiming a wicket off his leg break delivery. I hope he does not get dropped out of the side for this, just like in the case of Ajit Agarkar for his notoriety of being a bowler too-friendly to the likes of Ross taylor, Chris Gayle, Gilchrist and Mccullum.

The pre-match  telecast on Star Cricket, that is hosted by Harsha Bhogle, is not all farce, I feel. Today, they had a guy on their show, who said " If you have Ashish Nehra as your second best bowler of your side, you know you have serious troubles ahead!" 

LATER. 

Indians are the last living Britishers.

On another day, somebody on Fb forwarded to me a link of a 10 min video extract of a speech given by J.P.Narayan (founder of Lok Satta Movement in A.P.). While I haven't paid much attention to the details of the time and place and the occasion, on which he snapped in his speech in the round table conference, what really struck me at once was the fact that J.P. made a lot of sense. A few glib talkers have this duple quality of being precise and be reasonable.(e.g.Harsha Bhogle)

In that video, J.P. made a point where he mentioned about the present day election voting mechanism used by our election commission. While stressing on the inanity in persisting with the British-stylized voting system, he mentioned that even the brits have shown resistance to it. But, India remains unperturbed. This overhaul JUST doesn't matter to India.

We, and perhaps most of the nations, have blindly followed a few conceptions laid by a few dominant countries. E.g. the traffic rules, the education system, work cultures under the banner of PROFESSIONALISM (which in India is another word for intemperate and fucksome politics that is well backed up by cut throat competition and ever-getting-slender opportunities.) And the epitome of this exacting imitation is probably our LAW.

Our nation is now nicely supported by the Manufacturing sector for taking the nation towards realizing its goal (selected by one man and hardly followed by the rest) to become a developed nation by 2020. Yet, the manufacturing sector depends upon the systems prescribed by the oligarchic philosophies laid by the Americans and the Japanese. To be more correct, these systems have been conceptualized by the Americans, implemented first in Japan, and then followed by the rest nations and finally screwed up to its limits by China. (In China, there seems no batch or job productivity; there is only one basic system, MASS PRODUCTIVITY; to flood the world with MADE IN CHINA items.) Very few industrialists have ever really validated the REAL potential of the above productivity systems in the Indian scenario. Does TPS, JIT, TOC, Lean Manufacturing, Kaizen, Pokayoke, 2 Bins, etc. really work here? Does it really have in it to take the indianness of the Indi-Mfg sector to the level where the Americans and the Japanese have been dwelling post the World War II?

  Just came across this. 

 “ATITHI DEVO BHAVA!”

Our few cricketers and their captain did exactly the same to the Brit batsmen; with the same heartfelt gesture that it is seen in this picture on the face of our chachaji.




LATER.

World Cup Plan

Just thinking of posting my views on the World Cup cricket matches that will be played in the Indian Subcontinent.

Hope that the entire world cup thingy would be fun and positive.

And yes! Let's accept this guys, we are a strong contender to win the trophy this time around! We have got a good captain, strong batting, good spinners, good swing bowlers (Hope Sreesanth plays all the matches, coz he looked in shape in the warm-ups), young fielders and the man who's never failed in any world cup.. Sachin Tendulkar. (1999- Can't really be a failure if one scores a century, rescues the side from early exit, and that too, days after a huge personal loss.  2007 - more a team failure than an individual failure.)

Sachin is 3 short of 50 ODI hundreds. Knowing his nonplussing appetite for runs, there is no denying he might hit them all in this mega event. There is no question that it'll be yet again a Sachin Tendulkar World Cup.

I am missing that "OHH AHH INDIA .. AA GAYA INDIA" non sense ad campaign they had come up with last time around in 2007. To add to it was the ridiculous "MAIN SOURAV GANGULY ... BHULE TOH NAHI!" urge.

I am hopeful for a north stand ticket (FINAL on 02/04/201) that'll help me enter the newly made up Wankhede Stadium. So anybody, who can arrange the same is welcome.

SACHIN.... SACHIN !!!

Update on 20/02/2011.

TILL THEN, LIVE SWELL & EAT SWELL!
LATER.