MISSED RECALLS! ( PART-4)

It is yet again a LOOONNNGG POST.

For the VIVA, it is mandatory to come in a formal attire. Not mandatory, but something you should never avoid; just in case you face a difficult situation in VIVA, it might help. It is (Supposedly) an indication to the External (also the internal, whose memory isn't sharp, enough to forget your face) that you are VERY serious about the VIVA (education in general) and you are not CASUAL about it. You should also carry a pen, a clutch pencil ( Specially for the production guys) and an eraser( RUBBER) to a VIVA.

I reach the first floor and head towards the canteen. I glance inside the new CNC room opposite to the canteen. To check if the External has arrived. The central region of the canteen is occupied. Every time a classmate enters the canteen, the viva-prepared-heads swivel from the books towards the classmate. Bangia, Kedar, Anoop, Dravaspe, Neel and Sanam are seated in a circle. Iyer wants to study alone, not in the canteen. Neel ( my VIVA partner most times), who's usually better prepared than me asks "Kya Bhadku? Padha hai naa? I left tolerance chart." Delegation of preparation is another aspect for success in the VIVA. One should plan and decide the AREAS of preparation and divide the entire syllabus 50-50 with the VIVA partner. Preferably. Because, 100 % preparation is usually not possible. So, 50 % is better. The zero possibility of 100 % preparation is not applicable to the likes of Bangia, Khatri and Ganesh. Dravaspe comes prepared with the questions that are usually NOT asked. He throws them towards Bangia. But, Bangia being Bangia, is the only one amongst us who has answers to all of those questions thrown at him. He is smart enough  to even point out which questions are wrong at the first place.

A few more people join in. The first group is inside the VIVA room. For my batch, it was mostly Ganesh and Rashmi. Sometimes Anoop too would join them if it is the3-at-a-time case. ( Keyur, Ninad or Nagariya for the other batch)The second group waits outside, hastily doing the file 'Go Through'.

Being an OPENER at the viva is tough.
Reasons:
1) You have no idea what would be thrown at you. Questions I mean.
2) You do not know if the External is COOL or otherwise. And whether you can use phrases like "SORT OF" or MIGHT BE" and get away with them.
3) You do not know if the Internal is his own 'self' or is it that he suddenly has become harsher.
4) You do not know where the professors intend to concentrate-file or lecture pedagogy.
5) You have to remember each question that is asked to you for the benefit of the people to follow. ( Tough task really. Because, you would find it best to forget what happened in the viva as soon as you are out of it.)

The Benefits of not being an OPENER (luckily):
1) You know whether you should keep your file on the table or on your lap.
2) You know that a few questions that were asked earlier will be repeated.
3) You know the VIVA intensity. ( External cool or otherwise)
4) You know which topic is SAFE to be selected if asked to choose a TOPIC from the file.

I and Pranav get busy with a topic. Pranav is busy trying to explain to me TOLERANCE CHART. Iyer and Bhide join in too. Bhide gives the who-cares look. Pranav and me discuss about the efforts put into the FILE preparation. Rashmi and Ganesh are out of the VIVA room and they get surrounded in no time. Every one, individually, ask the two openers "kya poocha?". Kedar and me join in some conversation.
The conversation we indulged into is about a situation described as under:


DIGRESSION 3.0

We are seated beside the School Canteen Wall. The shadow of the wall is enough to sit under it and to open our files to read. The file consists of a lot of graph papers and tabular information gathered during the practicals attended earlier. In general, it was the subject related to ( I GUESS) temperature, enthalpy, entropy, petrol and diesel. The Laboratory is situated in the school building adjacent to the school canteen. It is the only lab in the world which has a SHATTER as the door to enter into the lab. Like the SHATTERS which most of the shops have. There is a RUMOR that the VIVA Groups are not as per the roll numbers. They are made randomly, on the spot. Anoop prays he is not grouped with a certain opsimath ( You see i pick up words with so much of thought in it. I say opsimath. The one who's slow at learning. But, the opsimath learns eventually and that is important. We all are opsimaths somewhere or the other).

The Professors, along with a lab incharge, FINALLY arrive at the place. Their serious faces make you realize that it is not just a practical exam and that there is a VIVA to follow. Though we are told to pick an answer sheet roll no wise, the groups are randomly formed. Everyone prays that they do not have to perform the REFRIGERATION experiment. Not because it is a tricky exp. but because it is usually performed individually.Big task. So, the groups are formed. The entire batch is told to fill-up the answer sheets. Everyone gets busy with producing the ROTE Observation tables on the sheet. Few even manage to vomit a few READINGS on them. Half of the batch is told to perform the practicals before the other half. While the other half is busy with their ADDITIONAL-TO-THE-PRACTICALS viva.

The group I belonged to was the only group having 3 members. Others had 2 members each. Anoop was paired with the opsimath. Kedar and Afzal were the other two in my group. We were required to perform an experiment 'with' and 'on' the 2-stroke diesel engine. We headed towards the diesel engine.

We quickly glanced at each others' answer sheets. And found out that all the three had 'tables' that were *mostly* the same. A few MINOR yet important changes were quickly made in the answer sheet. A few columns missed earlier were now in place. PHEWWWW. SIGH.

The professors signaled to start with the experiments and instructed us to call them as and when we finish with the PERFORMANCE. I noticed that the Diesel Engine is taller than Afzal. It is a huge engine cemented in the base. We all knew how to do the experiment. At least, we thought we did know. We had seen someone else perform it. We thought that would help. All the 3 of us waited for some one to start the proceedings. Finally, we began.

We tried some stuff on the diesel engine. We thought we were ON THE TRACK. After about 15 minutes, we were ready to start the diesel engine. Anoop had just abused his partner. He was on the Petrol Engine. After sometime, he was quick to realize that there wasn't any petrol in the petrol engine. So, he was seen climbing on a stool (the furniture thing) to put some petrol inside the engine so that he can perform the experiment successfully and pass. Hilarious!!


Afzal, who was the athlete amongst us, was told to do the honors that were the starting of the engine. ARDUOUS exercise it was.The activity involved rotating a lever REALLY REALLY fast. Though, in which direction was not finalized by us. We left it to Afzal's discretion. I took to holding the leaking water pipe. Holding was required in order to restrict few parts from popping out from the pipe. Some belt-pulley apparatus too had to be taken care of. While Kedar did the job of looking after the whole experiment. Afzal started rotating the lever furiously. Afzal was doing a great job, we thought. But, the engine JUST did not take off. He tried again. With more effort this time. But, the engine was still calm. Afzal tried it again. No result. We were left clueless. No answer to the problem. We asked the crisis man, Bangia. He had seen earlier that we were doing it the right way. But, the engine had some other ideas that day. Then we saw Mr.Gurav walking towards us. We told him our predicament. He told us to try it again. Afzal geared up again and took hold of the lever and rotated furiously. Mr. Gurav signalled to stop. His normally happy face turned into a STRAIGHT face. We thought, LAG GAYE BETA. He remained calm for a second. And then uttered " AREY LEVER ULTA GHUMAIGA TOH KAISE CHULA HOGA!"

^&*#%)*&^$&^^

So,finally Afzal zeroed in on the right direction of rotation.The faster Afzal rotated, the more the engine jerked. And Finally, the engine took off. Enough to grab the attention of the entire lab towards us. We were happy now. The apparatus i was holding was jerking tremendously. Water was gushing out from god-knows-which-place. My whole lower body was by now drenched with water. Felt nice. Then, Kedar also bathed. The engine produced a lot of noise. The Internal came nearer the engine. Saw us doing some stuff. Waited there to follow us more. And the belt pulley went berserk just the same time. Some more mishap followed. Suddenly, we saw combustion gases oozing out of the exhausts. We all looked at each other.Puzzled. Then came in the picture Mr.Gurav. He waved both his hands towards us and shouted " HATH JAOOO! HATH JAOOO!" Just like Amitabh Bachchan in Kalapatthar. I thought we had done something that meant TOTAL distruction of the engine. But, luckily it wasn't the case. But, enough to make the Internal say " You people don't know anything about the experiment!"

We somehow calculated 'something' and filled up the entire Observation table. The VIVA was the only part left now. We had to wait for our turn. Kedar and I got some much needed time to dry up ourselves.


We were called at the VIVA desk after sometime. The External sat to the right of the Internal ( While this information is just not necessary). Kedar was in the middle of the three of us. Clearly because we thought he knew the subject better than the other two in the group. I sat to the left of Kedar. And Afzal to the right. The external saw all the answer sheets. The first question was directed towards Afzal.


External: You think there is any mistake in your answer sheet. That is in the OBSERVATION Table, the headings of the column.

Afzal: No, Sir. ( Confidently)

External: There is a mistake.

Afzal ( Trying to re-consider his earlier reply): Ok.

External glanced at me and Kedar.
It was followed by some SERIOUS technical stuff. Only Kedar knew a bit of it though.

External to Me: Do you know ***** Cycle?

Me: No, Sir.
Afzal ( grabbing the attention of the profs) : I know. I know. I know.

Internal: OK, draw and show.
Afzal thinks hard and draws something.

Internal ( with his famous chicky laugh ): Yeh to KHUD ki ATLAS Cycle bana raha hai.
The Profs laugh looking at us. Kedar and I join them too.

External to all of us: What is the full form of ISFC,BSFC?
I nodded to show i-have-never-heard-of-such-stuff.
Kedar got one of the abbreviation correct.
Afzal again did the I-know-I-know-I-know thing.
Afzal to the Profs: Indian Standard....errr International Standard.....ahmmmmm ....?????????????/
External to Afzal : It is INDICATED SPECIFIC FUEL CONSUMPTION. That's why I asked you whether all that you have written in the answer sheet is correct or not!!!
Both the profs had a great laugh at us. SERIOUS, they appeared to me.

DIGRESSION 3.0 ENDS.


( To Be Continued....)

LATER.